Gone are the days when they’re sweet and clingy; now that your child has reached teenagehood, things have seemed to change.
Oh, yes. You know it did.
Before, they’re innocent, fun, and always excited about things.
Now, they’re moody and often frustrated about a lot of things, leaving most parents with teenagers frustrated, too.
Personally, I haven’t experienced dealing with a teenager since my son’s still a toddler but remembering how I was when I’m in my teenage years, I know how hard it is for my mom and dad to deal with me.
There are a lot of things that bother me and that often results in yelling, slamming of doors, and other unlikely scenarios.
You know how this goes. Perhaps, some of you have the same stories to tell and also, we all know that whatever mood we are feeling, it has nothing to do with our parents.
So, if you’re someone who’s having a hard time conversing with your teenage boy or girl, don’t freak out. Most of the time, their mood has nothing to do with you.
It’s a good and bad thing. Good because at least, you’re not the primary reason why your teen’s cranky all day. Bad because you have no control over it.
But does that mean that you cannot bring back the strong bond you once had?
Are there ways on how you can connect or at least, deal with moody teenagers?
If these are just some of your questions, then you’re in the right place!
In this post, we’ll talk about ways on how you can reconnect with your teens again.
How To Deal With Teenagers
It may seem weird but in reality, there’s a huge chance that your teen wants to connect with you. Perhaps they’re shy or they don’t know how to get started. Nevertheless, that’s what they wanted in the first place, no matter how hard it is to believe it.
So, the first thing you have to consider is their hormones. As a teen, a lot of changes take place and their hormones can influence their sexuality, physical development, emotions, and mental aspect.
Below are more ways to show support and reconnect with your teens.
Balance Your Role
As a parent, you either want to be their best friend — or their boss but too much of these things can’t really help.
Therefore, you must balance these roles and focus on becoming their moral mentor.
That being said, set yourself as your child’s role model. Show compassion but at the same time, be firm with your role and limitations.
Above all, be a good example to your teen and always “walk the talk, not talk the walk.”
Practice Active Listening
Even before when they’re still younger, practicing active listening helps when you want to nurture a healthy emotional space.
If you haven’t done this before, it’s never too late (or too early) to master this art.
Make it a habit and be sure to put an effort into doing so.
When you talk less and listen more, you are letting your child know that you acknowledge their feelings and whatever it is they’re going true, which is extremely important.
Through this, you do not only create a sense of safety and comfort but also, you are letting them know that they are important. That they are valued.
Active listening is one of the best ways to let your child know that “they matter” and through this, they avoid feeling misunderstood.
Value Your Child's Need For Privacy
As parents, we want to monitor our kids 24/7; however, this may not work well when your child has finally entered the teenage years.
There are things or activities that they want to keep to themselves but that doesn’t mean that it’s something illicit or shameful. Rather, it means that they do it just because they are developing a sense of independence.
They want to do things on their own and they want to feel that you trust them on whatever it is.
Privacy and trust are two strong words — and these are both important to your teenager.
That being said, be sure to respect their need for some time to be alone, just like what you need most, if not all the time.
Things are different now. When they’re younger, you need to know everything about them. Now, they keep secrets that you can’t just invade. They are far from the toddlers you’ve been with who doesn’t want to give you personal space, not even a bathroom break!
Now, they’re only a few years away from becoming an adult.
Communicate Constantly -- And Clearly
Communication is important to everything, especially to you and your teen.
It’s vital when you want to grow a good parent-teen relationship.
If you want to nurture the connection between you and your teenager, it’s crucial to let them know your rules, expectations, principles, and values. This helps avoid confusion and conflicts since your teen already knows what you want and need from them.
In line with this, make sure that your teens are on the same page, thus the importance of clear communication.
Do this regularly and just like the other ways, be sure to exert effort in relaying your message to your teen. That way, you are developing a sense of understanding while building a stronger, better relationship with your child.
It’s not going to be easy but with consistency and intention, you can make things better one step at a time.